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My 80 Worst Magic Creatures 50-41

My 80 Worst Magic Creatures 80-71
My 80 Worst Magic Creatures 70-61
My 80 Worst Magic Creatures 60-51

50. Phyrexian Marauder
Finally a X/X creature. Great deal. Except they nerf'd the hell out of it. The inability to block is a major drawback. Paying the upkeep cost essentially every turn is bad no matter how big the thing is. Is a generic 5/5 or 6/6 even worth this?

49. Emberwilde Caliph
 photo EmberwildeCaliph_zpse0a37076.jpg
This card was a good try. I can see some nice value in this. Those drawbacks are very intense. You literally can't hurt your opponent more than you are getting hurt - for the cost of a card. Not a great deal. If your opponent blindsides you with a larger flier, you've done messed up son. It's a very specific card against another very specific deck. The art is also boring for something so unique.

48. Harbor Guardian
 photo HarborGuardian_zpsffe0bd00.jpg
Another card I have like 80 of, so I hate it more than probably others I should. It always starts off so nice too. 3/4 Reach for 4. That might as well be all it is though, because to attack with it is not smart.
Rhox War Monk and Giant Spider are infinitely better.

47. Devouring Deep
 photo DevouringDeep_zps5ad36a52.jpg
I hate very specific cards. Trying to make the Gray Ogre look decent, we have the Devouring Deep. Wizards used to hate on Blue so badly. This actually exists in the same game as Boros Swiftblade.

46. Soldevi Heretic
 photo SoldeviHeretic_zps12292036.jpg
An ability that you would never use unless it was to save your Meddling Mage. Oh it's attached to a Gray Ogre body? Please play it then. Your opponent will take this deal 10/10 times. God I hate Gray Ogre.

45. Scornful Egotist
 photo ScornfulEgotist_zpsd5c9e5fa.jpg
I get that this will never be worse than a 2/2 for 3 - yes, a Gray Ogre. It's still a dumb card and actually makes Break Open (The Worst Card in the Game) useful.

44. Shitting Valesk
 photo SkittishValesk_zps21d69d19.jpg
I know you can use that morph argument like we did with Scornful Egotist, but I don't care. What the hell is that art? A facehugger, a crab, a saw? I don't know and I also don't know why someone would play this creature. I don't care if you pay 6 or 7 for it. You are only getting this creature every other turn on average and paying 6 repeatedly to do that. Then there will be that one game where you can barely use the vanilla thing. Just suck it up and play Balduvian Horde.

43. Phantasmal Sphere
 photo PhantasmalSphere_zpsbddca6b6.jpg
Despite it's casting cost, not a card you can consider playing early what-so-ever.  A cumulative upkeep that when it dies, your opponent gets the creature upkeep free. Just hope your opponent is playing Control Magic and has had too many Coors Lights.

42. Limestone Golem
 photo LimestoneGolem_zps20f3de7a.jpg
Making Obsianus Golem look good is not easy. I suppose you can pay 8 mana, block and cycle, but you get the idea. Pass on this.

41. Shimatsu the Bloodcloaked
Everyone loved the Wood Elemental so much they had to reprint it. Bigger, Faster, Stronger. At least it's Legendary so you can't play two... The only Red Demon creature type. Essentially a 0/0 Devour creature for 4. Compare that to Hellkite Hatchling.


  1. scornful egotist is very useful with dralnu's pet. A game winner, actually.


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39. Skyshroud Elite

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38. Sakura-Tribe Scout/Skyshroud Ranger

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