Skip to main content

My 100 Worst Magic Cards Part 4/5

40. Coral Reef
 photo CoralReef_zpsed7d7a31.jpg
Like a poor Blue Wizard's Castle. Double blue casting cost and requirement of a sacrificed Island and blue creature guarantees you need heavy blue to run this. Let's do math - Pay UUUUUU: Tap 4 Untapped Blue creatures to give one creature +0/+4. Not a thing champions are made of.

39. Mudhole
 photo Mudhole_zps9cfe73c0.jpg
There's probably some sideboard reason for a 3 mana Tormod's Crypt that only target's lands. You wouldn't touch this if you were Radkos - see Rakdos Charm. But I don't care to find out. Awful art, flavor text. I usually don't look at those things, but I really have as much to say about this card as it's effect on the game.

38. Shaman's Trace
 photo ShamansTrance_zpsb7382e08.jpg
This is nonsense. You thought Mudhole was bad. This only stops cards for one turn. Now you can Flashback your opponents cards for a turn. Need to Bash to Bits a pesky artifact? Do it with your opponents graveyard! This card will win some games. I don't use hyperbole.

37. Naked Singularity
 photo NakedSingularity_zps79f8cecd.jpg
What is going on with this card? How many turns can you possibly keep this up? Does your control deck produce 5 colors of mana(or 0 colors) or is in a good enough place to stop spell casting for a turn or two? Playing 4 Eon Hub? Time Walk it ain't. Silence it ain't. Blood Moon it ain't. Reality Twist it... oh it is...

36. Essence Bottle
 photo EssenceBottle_zpsae12c142.jpg
I've picked on life gaining quite a bit in this bottom 100. Gaining 4 life for 4 mana, or gaining 8 life for 12 mana - these are wastefully bad deals. However, to gain 2 life for 5 mana is painful. 4 life for 8 mana? 6 life for 11 mana? 8 life for 14 mana? This card has all of those beaten and requires tapping to use and charge which your opponent can blow up if it ever gets out of hand.

35. Part Water
 photo PartWater_zps568a3058.jpg
Start off and we have a sideboard Sorcery card. Okay. 3 mana to give one creature blue unblockable until end of turn. Very specific. But if you want a finisher, your going to pay through the roof. People ran Recall back in the day. So it's not just about cost, the ability is just not good.

34. Fanatical Fever
 photo FanaticalFever_zpsdbc3b74b.jpg
A Giant Growth, a Mutagenic Growth and Titanic Growth all rolled up into one... one casting cost that is. This doesn't save your creature like the Growths above. It's more like a Berserk which costs 4 times as much and is more useless on anything with a power greater than 1.

33. Rapid Fire
 photo RapidFire_zpscc73e238.jpg
It's a combat trick. Wait it's not. Play before defense is chosen? 4 mana is not acceptable for first strike. So for this to be useable you need to rely on your creature being double blocked then hopefully 2-1ing them. Your opponent isn't going to do this willingly unless your creature poses a threat.

32. Into Thin Air
 photo IntoThinAir_zps73f70d32.jpg
Affinity is a neat concept. You wouldn't run this card if you weren't heavy artifact. The issue is that most bounce spells - Chain of Vapor, Reset, heck even Boomerang - cost 1 or 2 mana anyway. There is just not enough of a reason to run an expensive bounce which only targets artifacts.

31. Jandor's Ring
 photo JandorsRing_zps642e1d97.jpg
I'm not one of those people who cycles cards very often. I'm not a huge play tester, I just run the cards I like. I wouldn't play a card like this. 8 mana to discard and draw a card is silly to me. Why play a card at all if it is worth no value to you. In limited, sure why not. You need to run 40 cards sometimes. But in a constructed environment - cycling is an added bonus, not something to strive for.

30. Morbid Hunger
 photo MorbidHunger_zpsd4f42415.jpg
Why are cards capitalized on the flavor text of the card and not the title. This is 3 times as expensive as Lightning Helix and at Sorcery speed mind you. But wait, it has flashback for the low low cost of 9 mana. That's almost a tease rather than being useful. I dislike this more than Vampiric Feast(#60) because while it's slightly more expensive, Feast has more game change ability. If that was even possible. Make sure you are playing Crypt Ghast or Lake of the Dead to use this thing.

29. Mammoth Harness
 photo MammothHarness_zpsc03adf1f.jpg
More lowercase-ness. Poor Green. 4 mana doesn't give you decent removal. All you get is Roots, Shrink and the ability to give your opponent a 3/3 creature. Removing flying and giving last strike is not going to work only any good creature. It might cause problems with 3 drop fliers, but not 4s likely making this a very poor card. And a rare.. ha.

28. Call for Blood
 photo CallforBlood_zpsf44ddfe0.jpg
2-1ing yourself is never a good idea. But to make Call for Blood worse, you need 5 mana and a creature with power at least as great as one of your opponents creatures toughness in order to do so. Specific + Inefficient + Expensive = Terribleness.

27. Lifted By Clouds
 photo LiftedByClouds_zps126e445f.jpg
Jump and Leap were too powerful so they had to tack on 2 colorless mana and some crazy creature art.

26. Rakalite
 photo Rakalite_zps2383b990.jpg
One of my least favorite as I have multiple copies and I always feel like it might be useful. But the return to hand effect is just not going to fly in any deck I play. This card would just not be made now days. I love doing the math. Want to prevent 3 damage on 2 consecutive turns? How about 24 mana!?

25. Juju Bubble
 photo JujuBubble_zps2e671c88.jpg
Oh stupid life gaining, you're back in our lives already. You can't play another card while this is in play. I don't think your opponent will mind. It has a cumulative upkeep so you can't even race this effectively. 5 mana to gain 2 life? Oh Sweet Essence Bottle Irony. Go and play with Prototype Portal.

24. Snowfall
 photo Snowfall_zpsd07ba90f.jpg
Holy cow. Need to keep the Cumlative Upkeep alive for that Naked Singularity or Illusions of Grandeur? I suppose you can use this, albeit temporarily as this thing itself has CU. Why does it cost 3 mana for this effect? Were they just trying to mess with us? Tapping an Island for 3 blue sounds good, but pointless since you need snow covered Islands and cards with CU. At least they made Braid of Fire to try and forget this card.

23. North Star
 photo NorthStar_zpsbed4068b.jpg
Mana Fixing! Just pay the 8 mana up front and tada, 5 colors here we come. This is not a serious card. Only in the earliest of Legend decks trying to play those 3 color dragons would have attempted to run this. Laugh now as we have Prismatic Omen and Chromatic Lantern.

22. Sandstone Deadfall.
 photo SandstoneDeadfall_zps10aaeeda.jpg
Gehh. 2 lands and a card and 3 mana to take out an attacking creature. Your opponent knows this is coming. He will only attack if it's acceptable. And boy to 3-1 yourself(and your opponent's 1 is conditional) is about as terrible of a deal as your going to get.

21. Erosion
 photo Erosion_zps1b8aa8d3.jpg
The terrible art, the terrible 3 blue casting cost, the terrible everything. The fact that it doesn't even destroy a land, it just taps it down your opponents worst land...optionally. Play 4 and watch as your opponent's head explodes while he is busy playing real spells. Watch your opponent quiver in horror while you play a first turn Black Lotus and drop Erosion onto their Plains. Make sure to cackle as you do so as he or she conceits.


  1. Erosion is actually terrifying.


Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

My Top 100 One Drop (CC) Creatures (20-1)

My Top 100 One Drop (CC) Creatures (100-81)
My Top 100 One Drop (CC) Creatures (80-61)
My Top 100 One Drop (CC) Creatures (60-41)
My Top 100 One Drop (CC) Creatures (40-21)

20. Vexing Devil

Giving an opponent a choice is never a good idea. However I really feel like it's win win here in the aggressive deck. A 4/3 for one will almost always be worth a card. So the real question is - is it worth a card to deal 4 damage for a red? It's not quite Flame Slash good in a control deck, or as great top deck as Thunderous Wrath but better than Thunderbolt or Lava Axe.

19. Scute Mob

Not a true one drop. But by turn six hopefully you are going get a hydra-like insect that will quickly get insanely huge if not dealt with. My biggest issue is that it doesn't have trample. It's still a great costed creature that can do some work if unchecked. There are lots of ways to give it Trample in Green not named Rancor.

18. Dragonmaster Outcast

And yet another non-true one drop. If you can stay…

My Top 100 One Drop (CC) Creatures (100-81)

One drops are the least important thing in any draft or sealed pool. You shouldn't play them pretty much ever. They typically do little for you, don't fit random cards, or just suck. And why should they, you aren't expected to win the game by turn 1(not counting you Legacy). In constructed, it's a whole different ball game. You have these cheap cards that actually interact with other cards in your deck. Not only that - your selection is a lot wider and if you look deep enough, you can find cards that can really put the pressure on.

The number 100 just kind of worked out. There are approximately 600 one costed creatures, and I honestly only checked out about 400 of them - top half and the very bottom(maybe I trust The Gatherer too much, but I'm always open to suggestions!). I found 95 that I really liked just naturally. The other 5 are included as my bottom 5, but 100 of course just sounded better.
I could have forced myself to get 5 more, but there are essentially…

My Top 100 One Drop (CC) Creatures (40-21)

My Top 100 One Drop (CC) Creatures (100-81)
My Top 100 One Drop (CC) Creatures (80-61)
My Top 100 One Drop (CC) Creatures (60-41)

40. Gnat Miser

Since it doesn't really affect the battlefield, it's hard to rank it higher. But it has a great little ability on turn one(especially on the play) and it works well in multiples. 

39. Skyshroud Elite

It's an elvish Kird Ape! It doesn't have the pesky Mountain requirement and any decent deck is going to have a non basic land. If by rare chance your opponent is on the draw and waits to play their special lands, you are left with a pitiful 1/1. And it's ceiling is just a 2/3 so it's good, but not great.

38. Sakura-Tribe Scout/Skyshroud Ranger

I think doing it as an instant and then casting something large with flash would work, so the Scout might be strictly better than the ranger. Early game these things do work. Late game they do virtually nothing. 

37. Slumbering Dragon

I think you need to abuse this to make it really…